The Giving Paradox
‘Tis the season for thanks and giving with much more giving and receiving in months to come. It’s understood that giving helps people and you probably already know it’s proven to help the giver too. And yet sometimes, when given the opportunity to give, we don’t. So, what gives?
A quick Google of ‘health benefits of giving’ will yield research too lengthy to even reference here. In summary, giving encouragement, time and money is shown to lower blood pressure and stress, increase self-esteem and feelings of happiness – with strong links to longer, healthier living. What’s not to love about that?!
Despite the favorable evidence, the concept of giving can create a set of conflicting elements that seem impossible to reconcile. Nonetheless, they turn out to be true; in short, a paradox.
Consider these familiar phrases. The more you give, the more you receive. The more you do, the more you CAN do. Lose your life to save it.
Most of us love the second part of the phrase; receive more, get more done, save lives. It’s the first part that gives us pause. And yet it is the very act of doing more, giving more that ends up yielding the very best results – both for others and for us.
Why Give?
There are many mental, emotional and physical benefits connected to the act of giving. Biologically, giving is linked to an increase in dopamine, oxytocin and serotonin in our bodies. These are the “feel good” chemicals the brain creates that regulate how we feel.
And most experts agree that among the basic human needs, the act of giving, whether donating to charity or volunteering time, fulfills some essential elements of both emotional and spiritual needs.
So, to sum it all up, giving
fullfills a basic human need (or two)
produces both ‘good feelings’ and better health
and, although sometimes hard to do, it is a beneficial thing for both the giver and the recipient
The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable of receiving. —Albert Einstein
Where to begin
Giving doesn’t have to be a grand gesture to make a difference. The smallest effort, multiplied across people and over time will create a wave of change. Here are a few suggestions to get you started.
PAUSE. Make time to listen to others at work and home.
REFOCUS. Work to shift ‘self-centered’ thoughts & feelings to ‘other-centered’ – what if we took fewer ‘selfies’ and more ‘us-ies’?
OFFER HELP. Ask ‘How can I help?’ then take action.
HIT THE GIVE BUTTON. Make a donation to a nonprofit organization.
SPEND TIME. Visit a Senior Adult Center or Hospital and ask people to share stories about their lives. Listen.
TAKE ACTION. Volunteer your time at a shelter or community service organization.
TRAVEL WITH PURPOSE. Go on a mission trip where you volunteer time, expertise and/or physical action to help others.
Here’s the reality. Although it may feel uncomfortable to get started, you’ll quickly realize that it feels good to give.
Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not. – Dr. Seuss
